心宿二愛說話

What is my really sounds of mind?
It does really make me crazy.

There are many things happened recently,
Loving, Working, Studying, ... ,
I am not a superwoman, and I feel tired now...

For my dear boy, I still love you,
but I have considered the relation between us in the nearest days.
Are you the one who is worthy of my love?
I puzzled.
You didn't talk to me actively,
and you didn't care for me actively, too.
Sometimes, you were good at me, but just 'SOMETIMES'
In fact, we have more and more blank time while talking.
It made me sad but I have no ideal to change the situation.
How I wonder the time back to the origin, when we have many interaction..

I can't understand what you think,
and I don't know whether you still have me in your mind.
I am very confused!
The reason which seperated us may be not the truth.. I guess.
I still love you, but do you still love me?

Another thing in my life which also makes me tired is my schoolwork.
After the midexam, I am not sure if I am suitable for studying.
Should I pause my schoolwork for some time?
Do I have the capability to continue?
Or before I continue my study, I have to reenforce my background?

I've changed my way to prepare the midexam,
I've spent much time to think how the formulae come from,
then memoried them, but I still didn't do well on the midexam.
I cannot write down the answers of most questions,
even if those problems seems have appeared in my class-note, and I have read.
Everyone of my classmates can discusse the answers expect me.
I have no sense to deal with the problems I met. So sad..

I loss my self-confidence, and I can't make myself happy.
So terrible!! It is not the true Abby!!
Where is the happy Abby?
Well, really tired.. I want to relax.
Both the schoolwork and love.
Maybe suspend my schooling (without losing my status as a student)
is the better way for me...